趣味英语第157期:怎么知道现在是离开互联网的时候了

Davio... I'm not gonna pronounce this right. Okay, "Astvaldersson"...

我想这个名字我可能念不对。好吧，Davio Astvaldersson问道：

Say that when you're drunk a couple of times.

在你喝醉好几次的时候。

How do you know it's time to leave the Internet?

怎么知道现在是离开互联网的时候了？

Well, your eyes get blinded.

嗯，在你的眼睛快瞎了的时候。

When you can't keep your eyes open anymore you probably should go to sleep and then leave the Internet.

当你的眼睛睁不开了时，你也许应该去睡觉了，那时就是离开互联网的时候。

When you started in the morning and it's already night.

在你从早上开始上网一直持续至晚上的时候。

Pretty much when your parents say, "Get to beeeeeed!"

在你的父母说“去睡觉”的时候。

If you've been on it all day, and your parents are starting to complain, and you're not doing your homework.

如果你一整天都在上网，你的父母已经开始念叨而且你还没有做作业，那就是那个时候。

When you're procrastinating¹ and you see homework and you need to do it.

在你一直拖拉，还要做作业的时候。

You know it's time to go when you just start typing random² things into the search box.

当你开始在搜索框随意输入的时候，你应该知道你该离开互联网了。

The way it happens for me is I get into the deep YouTube or the deep web and just the stuff where you're like, "What the f-- what am I watching?"

对我来说，在我深陷youtube和网络的时候，会突然发现“我TM到底在看什么东西？”这时我知道应该离开互联网了。

When you're at the weird³ part of YouTube and you're watching popping pimple⁴ videos... that's when you should leave.

在你在youtube网站上一个奇怪的分区观看出痘视频时，那就是你应该离开互联网的时候。

I really don't know why you'd want to leave the Internet at this point. Otherwise, what are you going to do all day?

我真是不知道你为什么想在现在离开互联网。不上网的话，你这一整天要干什么？

That's easy! You don't leave the Internet. No one leaves the Internet. You stay on it for as long as possible, until your computer dies and you can't find the charger. As soon as you find the charger, go immediately back on because you will have withdrawals⁵. It's bad.

很简单！你不会离开互联网。没有人会离开互联网。你会尽可能长地留在互联网，直到你的电脑关机，直到你找不到充电器。而你一找到充电器，就会马上开始上网，你会收回你的话。那很糟糕。

1 procrastinating   

拖延，耽搁( procrastinate的现在分词 )； 拖拉

参考例句：

• Begin while others are procrastinating. Save while others are wasting. 当别人拖延时你开始。当别人浪费时你节约。
• Before adjourning, councillors must stop procrastinating and revisit this controversial issue. 在休会之前，参议员必须停止拖延，重新讨论这个引起争议的问题。

2 random   

adj.随机的；任意的；n.偶然的(或随便的)行动

参考例句：

• The list is arranged in a random order.名单排列不分先后。
• On random inspection the meat was found to be bad.经抽查，发现肉变质了。

3 weird   

adj.古怪的，离奇的；怪诞的，神秘而可怕的

参考例句：

• From his weird behaviour,he seems a bit of an oddity.从他不寻常的行为看来，他好像有点怪。
• His weird clothes really gas me.他的怪衣裳简直笑死人。

4 pimple   

n.丘疹，面泡，青春豆

参考例句：

• His face was covered with pimples.他满脸粉刺。
• This is also a way to prevent the pimple.这也是防止疙瘩的一个途径。

5 withdrawals   

n.收回，取回，撤回( withdrawal的名词复数 )；撤退，撤走；收回[取回，撤回，撤退，撤走]的实例；推出（组织），提走（存款），戒除毒瘾，对说过的话收回，孤僻

参考例句：

• He has made several withdrawals from his bank account. 他从银行账户上提了几次款。 来自《简明英汉词典》
• It is not the bank's policy to deduct interest on withdrawals. 提款需扣除利息这并非是本银行的政策。 来自辞典例句